-Do get medical attention for a victim if the relationship becomes physically abusive. -Do offer your unconditional friendship and support. If it's uncomfortable to discuss the relationship itself, start by helping them feel good about themselves. Talk to them about their strengths. By rebuilding his/her confidence it easier to visualize being out of the relationship. - Do be clear that you are there to listen, and not to judge. There is an important balance between expressing concern and telling someone what to do. Encourage them to express their feelings and make their own decisions. He/she is smart for acknowledging the abusive behavior. - Do tell your friend it's not his/her fault. Stress that he/she does not deserve the abuse and that abuse is NEVER acceptable. Remind her/him often that you are there for support whenever necessary. - Do accept what he/she tells you. Skepticism will drive him/her away. - Do identify the unhealthy behaviors. Keep track of things you have noticed about the relationship and the abuser. Identify the changes you have seen in your friend's behavior. - Do acknowledge the scariness of dating violence. It is scary and difficult to talk about it. Be prepared with good information. - Do encourage the victim to build a support system. A wide-reaching support system includes parents, teachers, counselors, and other friends. A safety plan is a good place to start.             - Don't spread gossip. Gossip can put a victim in danger if it gets back to the abuser, so think before you speak. Your friend has taken a big step in coming to you—it is critical that they can trust you with confidential information. - Don't directly confront the abuser. Avoid all contact whatsoever. - Don't blame your friend for the abuse. The victim should never feel as though the abuse is his/her fault. - Don't rush. Leaving an abusive situation usually takes time and isn't something to rush. Be there and be patient, so the victim can emerge from the problem on his/her own timetable. - Don't make them do something. Don't force your friend do something s/he may feel uncomfortable doing. The victim needs to make his/her own decisions. It's okay to be persuasive, but never to get angry. Don't try to end the relationship for them. - Don't criticize your friend or his/her partner. Even if you disagree with his/her choices. This may isolate your friend even more by making them feel that no one approves, or that they have to hide their relationship.