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At first, I couldn't believe it when Katelyn starting dating Jared.
Every girl at school wanted him--how did she do it? He played
baseball, his family was well-off, and he was so hot. |
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I thought
he was really thoughtful too--he was always picking Katelyn up
for school, buying her lots of gifts. He even bought her this
really expensive cell phone that she wanted. I was jealous, my
boyfriend never even bought me flowers. Whenever we hung out, she
was always telling me how much she loved being with him. He called
her all the time just to see what she was doing and tell her that
he loved her.
After a while, it started getting old. It was like they were totally
obsessed with each other. Actually, it was more like he was obsessed
with her. She stopped playing soccer because Jared wanted to spend
more time with her. I know when you start dating someone, it's new
and everything and you want to spend time with them, but giving up
your favorite sport? He was always buying her stuff , but they weren't
thoughtful little gifts anymore. It was like he was trying to own her
or something. I kept telling her it was weird, and that you shouldn't
have to buy people things to make them care about you. She told me he'd
been so good to her and she felt guilty about not being with him.
We barely saw each other, and if we did, he would always check up on her.
How annoying is it to go out with your friend and her phone never stops
ringing? We couldn't even get coffee without him wanting to know where
she was. I finally had it and told her he was being so controlling--buying
her things so she felt like she owed everything to him, wanting to be with
her all the time. Of course, in the middle of our conversation, her cell
rings. She didn't pick up. It rings again, so she turns it on silent.
Finally, after the fourth time, she answers. Guess who? She asks him to
stop calling her, and you know what he said? "I bought you that phone and
I can tell you when to pick it up and when not to!"
We stopped hanging out after that. I told Katelyn she wasn't the same
person when she was with Jared, and she told me I didn't know what it was
like to be in love. Well, if being "in love" is having to be with your
boyfriend 24-7 and always worrying about upsetting him, I'd didn't want
that kind of life. How could she not see the way Jared was turning her
into something else he owned? She let him buy her like he bought all those
presents. It was so obvious to me that something was wrong, but when I
pointed out his controlling behavior, she was all defensive about it.
What else could I do?
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