Get Involved as an Individual When witnessing an abusive situation, it's easy to think, "What can I do? I'm only one person," or "It's not my business," or simply pretend it's not happening. We feel it is your obligation to help a friend in an abusive relationship. The attitude of "there's nothing I can do" is one reason why relationship violence continues to grow. These are places to start. They are some small, yet effective ways to help: 1. Call the behavior what it is. Tell your friend that there's a difference between being abusive and having a bad day. 2. Don't put up with language that promotes abusive behavior and attitudes. This is language like "wife beaters" or "bitch-slap." If you are not comfortable calling other people on it, lead by example and remove it from your own vocabulary. 3. Approach this as a shared issue. Either a man or a woman can be the victim. Either can be the abuser. Both can serve as good role models for each other. 4. Analyze your own actions and beliefs. Try to understand how your own attitudes and actions might allow violence. 5. Support others working to end violence. Attends events and/or volunteer. 6. Be an example for those younger than you. Show that you care about the issues, and they will care too. If they learn about the issues early, they will be better-prepared in the future. 7. Become an activist